current song Breathe by Prodigy

Loka Samastha Sukhino Bhavantu

whatever little we each can...

http://tsunamihelp.blogspot.com
The South-East Asia Earthquake and Tsunami
News and information about resources, aid, donations and volunteer efforts.

http://survivors.aidindia.org
AID India Relief and Rehabilitation Fund

It was a stormy night. And when I say night, it was actually 6 in the evening but it was almost pitch dark. He hurried across the road, the footpath, the sludge between the road and the footpath. Shoes getting soiled. Criss-cross between the pani-puri stalls, parked cars and puddles. There was a traffic jam. This didnt bother him as he was on foot. There was a lot of noise around. Not only from the rain hitting the hoods of the cars slap-slap, not only from all the frustrated drivers blaring horns, but also such random sounds such as a dog barking, or someone putting his bike on full throttle to remove the water that had entered the exhaust, aggregated to give the effect of a great kitchen orchestra. All these sounds didnt bother him either. He moved purposefully through the mayhem, unwavering. Surely he would have remained unwavered even if God had chosen to break anonymity at that moment. As if the rest of the world was in freeze-frame, he navigated his way around each person, each vehicle, each puddle and each lamp-post with utmost finesse. He was a man with a mission and that mission, whatever it was made him twice the man he was. He had already covered 300 yards thus and that was good progress. His movements were precise, calculated. His entire journey till now seemed like one fluid motion. Never hesitating, never changing course at the last moment, never jerky. Looking at him you would wager he could tell you exactly how he was going to cover the next 300 yards too - each step, each twist of the hip propelling him sideways to avoid pedestrians, each nimble little hop over the ubiquous puddles. It was as if he had precognition and indeed vehicles would dash into each other, people would collide and waste would fall from nearby windows merely split seconds after he was in the very same spot. He was the epitome of grace the pinnacle of speed, the quintessence of poise, the embodiment of stealth, the crest of purposefulness and the personification of perfection. But whats the use? He still got wet. In monsoons, carry a raincoat. Issued in public interest by the association of rain-wear manufacturers.


current song Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz.

11 seconds!

I'm getting better

current song Born to Be Wild by Steppenwolf

edgekayshun

a retort from an edgy friend to the signature line in my personal email - "if you're not living on the edge you're taking up too much space"
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If somebody is already living on the same edge, do we hold their hand or push them out to live in that edge??

Ya! space is always a problem!! So I started car-pooling. Now, my boss doesn't like that becoz my timings changed. Do you think I am on the EDGE of losing my job??? I am a bit confused. Did I start living on the EDGE once I started car-pooling? Or Did I put myself on the EDGE of losing my job becoz my boss doesn't like my timings?? Or do you think I am on different EDGES on different issues?? If that is true, then how can I be on different edges at the same time?? So what I assume is THERE IS ALWAYS ONLY ONE EDGE. No matter what you do we always end up on the same EDGE. And I name that EDGE "RISK". Now how many people would like to RISK their positions???........

Did I tell you why I am car-pooling? It is to save some space on the road for other cars.

current song Stairway To The Stars by Ella Fitzgerald

tanha dil

Main aur meri tanhayee aksar yeh baatein karte hain.
Tum hote toh aisa hota. Tum hote toh waisa hota.
Tum is baat pe kitna hanste. Tum is baat pe hairan hote.
Main aur meri tanhayee aksar yeh baatein karte hain.

current song Jal Jaayen by Josh

Dear Papa

I have not as many memories of you,
Of summer afternoons in a park
As I have of mamma and me
And endless hours of scrabble.
But guilty I am, of ignoring
How patiently you waited outside
As mamma and I would debate colours
Over prices, how we would haggle.

I cannot recall, not once
Your interest in my homework
Or, for that matter
Your presence at a PTA meet.
But selfishly I overlooked, that you
Brought home every single summer
My favourite mangoes, so deliciously sweet.

Always tied up you were
In the binds of fraternity and kin
And I never felt you appreciated
My honesty, or recognised my individuality.
But how wrapped was I in
The immature trappings of youth
That I could not look beyond
What I perceived was, insensitivity?

I do not remember your asking me
About my first day in college
About my teachers, "do you like them"?
Or even, "how are your grades?".
But never can I forget, how you
Painstakingly packed my suitcases
How you hugged me and cried
Bid me farewell, at the airport gates.

You were never on my side
You called me a rebel
Never had we, any conversations
But oh arguments there were galore.
Now my heart flips with joy
For I love how much we talk
When I call out to you
Anytime, from any distant shore.

I fell in love, it broke and trampled my heart
And try as I might, I could not think
Of anyone to turn to but you
To pick me up, to help me cope.
You held me long and you held me tight
In your arms so strong. And spoke to me
Like never before. Yes, I remember
Those magical words, of life and of hope.

"I probably never, have told you
In so many words. You my dear are
My pride and happiness, my source of strength
Bear ever in your heart, what I tell you now.
My little girl, for that is what you will always be
Whatever it takes, as long as I live,
No hurt, no pain, not a shadow of gloom
Will I, let crease your brow."

As I lie here, reminiscing years spent
Holding, begrudgingly, against you
Unspoken words, unfulfilled hugs
What a fool I have been, I realize.
My quest for a fairytale father
Ends here, now. For I have found
My knight in shining armor
In the love that shines, in my father's eyes.

weekend soundtrack

just cut a CD

AC/DC - Hells Bells
George Michael - Freedom
Metallica - Whiskey In The Jar
Queen - Bohemian Rhapsody
The Bee Gees - Stayin' Alive
Queen & Guns 'N' Roses - We Will Rock You
Def Leppard - Love Bites
Five For Fighting - 100 Years
Dirty Vegas - Days Go By (Accoustic version)
Gary Moore - King Of Blues
Guns 'N' Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine
INXS - Strangest Party
Jimmy Hendrix - Purple Haze
Sting - Desert Rose

current song Morphine by Michael Jackson

caferati.blogspot.com

doing my usual roundup of my must-read-daily blogs somehow i landed there. one post, two, three and i kept going. i even forgot to pull up my faithful winamp and tune into my favourite radio station. so many amazing poems. beautifully written. myriads of shades. all hues of red, black, white, grey, gold, of pain, of joy, of love, of freedom. and i discover im at my happiest when im reading poetry. ive been making feeble attempts, poking a shy finger every now and then at poetry. if i gather all the poems ive written since i was a kid i wouldn't need more fingers than i have to count them. (OMG i suddenly recall the title of what i think is my first complete poem - Rat in the King's palace.....yes yes it was about a king who had a mortal fear of rats....well i was only nine, i should think, then *sheepish smile*)

i admit. i'm not very well read when it comes to the great works of the masters. somewhere along the course of my life i had let other mundane circumstances take over and my passion for poetry (more reading than writing!), reading, writing, and painting got shadowed by what proved to be the most dismal and abyssmal period of my life. now i'm back in control, at the helm. i may be a late bloomer but i have my chance to revive and re-live. and this time i know exactly which direction im headed in and which paths to avoid. and no matter what nobody is ever going to take away from me my books, paints and poems.

idling away

what gorgeous weather outside! having a warm rainy night followed by a bright sunny morning is such a treat in the middle of a fall that seems set to precede a rough winter.

have been reading Shashi Tharoor's "The Great Indian Novel". i have to say i am completely entranced by Tharoor's smooth, flowing, lucid style peppered with the vernacular be it sardonic prose or rib-tickling poetry. the story is qite long, covering 3 generations and i've probably been at it for more than 3 weeks (considering the book has been slotted for commute-read). even so im hooked and can't wait to explore other works of the prolific prodigous writer-diplomat (PhD at 22 for heaven's sake!). i've got Riot and Business on reserve at the library and i still have to finish with chitra banarjee and douglas adams before i can read those. and then there are these exceptional blogs more and more of which i stumble across everyday. Lordy! so much to read...

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on a musical note, have been listening to the album Kabhi by Josh. me liketh a lot! after our first internationally reknown rock band indus creed, for a while there with the entry of bands like silk-route there seemed to be hope yet for the indi-pop scene. and then 'kaanta laga' happened. and every skinny girl with a half 'bare'-able body wanted to gyrate to badly mixed RD Burman songs. and now rock bands like parikrama and pop bands like strings and josh have restored my faith in indian fusion artists.

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now that my boss successfully thinks i'm very vella i think i'll leave the rest of my idle thoughts to a later post and actually get some work done.

current song Gharee by Josh

defiant. belligerent. reckless. irreverent. impatient. restless. uprooted.

atrophied fingers itching to wriggle and break free of the constraints of civility. to deform, deface, destroy. the deceptively strong arms of faith slack, weak and weary. the seemingly infinite wells of patience, drained and depleted. demons that inhabit the dark crevices of my soul emerge victorious. and i shall never be the same.

sigh…whats that I hear you say? you are here now? to save me from myself? aah but it is too late. so leave now. lest you be poisoned by the venomous hatred that flows through my veins. but before you do, one last kiss my love?

current song I Would Do Anything For Love by Meat Loaf

blogger ate my post from last night!! it was there last night, published and all and now its gone! vanished. poye poche. poyinde. gaayab.

hmmpf. can't recall even half of it. though, i do remember it was funny :-D

current song Little Drummer Boy by Bob Seger

the temperature in the car was toasty and comfortable, the radio tuned to 97.1 FM. trying to get into the cozy, warm, cheerful holiday mood. and then, a request. a dedication. from friends to friends. "the christmas shoes" about a boy who wants to buy shoes for his sick and dying mom but just doesn't have enough money. and i parked. and cried. like a baby.

this christmas. this new year. please GIVE.

farewell chuck

the last day i'd see my boss in a long, long time.

my first boss, a true to the sign gemini, he always managed to keep me on my toes.

surprise-graduation-partythrowing boss

can-drive-me-up-the-wall boss

Jimmy-Hendrix-posters-in-his-office boss

part-time-tattoo-artist boss

anti-bush-t-shirt-printing boss

amateur-boxer-and-cross-country-biking boss

definitely-one-of-a-kind boss!

there were times when he would be so good to me that i'd just want to give him one big kiss (no, never did so) and then there were times he would so thoroughly succeed in making me feel so miserable and dumb that i would just walk out and bury myself in books at the boosktore downstairs.

at times he'd cut me off mid-sentence, so curt and so overbearing, telling me he didn't care what i thought. other times he would come to my cube and ask me for my opinion on the latest wireless laptops we should order or about the eccentricities of his current girlfriend. damn, i remember the one time he filled me in on his plans for valentine's day. "a suite at a bed and breakfast by the mountains, plenty of candles and rose petals on the bed and doing the things adults do", he said pointing to huge bags filled with the rose petals he had pre-ordered and just picked up from the local florist's. just a little bit more information than i needed but what the heck. it sounded really good and now i knew just what to ask my non-existant boy-firend for next valentine's day. when i first started and was apprehensive of doing anything at all beyond what I was there to do, he would download songs of metallica, fiona apple and others and make me CDs from them.

just before graduation day about a year ago, he had developed stress fractures on his foot (very active guy, he) and had to wear a cast. it was painful for him to walk around and for others to watch him walk. even so, as i later found out, he had bought a card, walked about the entire office (which spans a whole block) and gotten it signed by every single person. and then, the afternoon of the day i was to graduate, he radioed me asking me for help with something in the big boardroom. when i walked into the office i saw what seemed to be everybody and a huge cake on the table with a graduation scroll and huge balloons tied to it. it took me a moment to realize my name was written on it and that this was a SURPRISE GRADUATION PARTY for me!!! i have never, ever, had so pleasant a surprise :-) he had convinced everyone to chip in and buy me a leather portoflio case which never fails to make me smile. and he told everybody how proud he was of me. ohh how i smiled, i didn't even mind them calling me the baby of the team anymore.

aah what a love-hate relationship I have had with this man.

as he said his goodbyes and thanked me for all my hardwork i would be lying if i denied a faint tugging at my heartstrings. and long after he had hugged me and left, I could still smell the faint whiff of his perfume on me. when things got ugly (irate end-users expecting miracles) I always sought refuge in him and his seniority. and he was always on my side. i shall miss him.

i wish i could have thrown him a surprise farewell party. but things being the way they are, i couldn't. and i will always regret it.

good-bye and plenty of good luck to you chuck. hope u have tones of fun in Thailand, may all you dreams come true and may the adventurous spirit of yours (that has many a time inspired to look beyond my boundaries for the new and exciting) never wane.

current song Sound Of Silence by Paul Simon (sure is silent without the sound of metal blaring out of his office)